One liners

+ Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
+ If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
+ Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
+ For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
+ No one is listening until you make a mistake.
+ Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
+ A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
+ Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
+ Half the people you know are below average.
+ 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. - Steve Wright, performance. 1983 (?)