That Thing We Used to Do

There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked." - Jerry Seinfield

Three old men were sitting on a park bench, when a beautiful young girl went jogging by in blue terrycloth shorts and wearing a ponytail. The first old man said, "If I could catch up with her, I would hold her hand." The second old man said, "Yeah, and if I could catch her, I'd give her a kiss!" The third old man joined in and said, "You bet! And if I could catch her, I'd—, I'd— . . . Fellas, what was that other thing we used to do?”